International Cesarean Awareness Network

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CBAC Awareness Month – Anna’s CBAC Birth Story

February 22, 2021 by blog

After my traumatic first birth which resulted in cesarean, I was determined to have a VBAC. The providers in my area were more VBAC “tolerant” than “supportive”, so I landed on having my VBAC at home with a midwife. I did endless research and felt confident in our birth plan.

My waters ruptured at 39 weeks and contractions started 12 hours later. My contractions came on hard and back to back, endlessly for another 15 hours. I had not progressed at all during that time and decided it was time for us to transfer to hospital. Some nurses were super supportive while others were a little more judgmental.

After an epidural, the on-call OBGYN came in and “told me” we were doing a cesarean despite me and baby doing great. I told her no, as long as we were doing well, I’d be the one to decide if we wanted to proceed with cesarean. I was required to sign a refuse to consent form and she made it clear she did not agree with my decision. Six hours later I still had not progressed at all and decided myself that I was ready for the cesarean.

Although the birth was not at all how I’d planned, I was informed and empowered and I called the shots. Overall it was a positive experience and my sweet baby boy joined our family!

Thank you for sharing your story with us, Anna!

Share your story with ICAN to be featured on our Instagram and Facebook! All cesarean and birth-after-cesarean stories are welcome: the difficult, the triumphant, the still-processing, and the stories which haven’t yet been shared. Sharing your birth story can be freeing, healing and profoundly powerful. It can bring others hope, comfort, and reassurance that they are not alone on their birth journey.

Submit your story HERE: https://airtable.com/shrJOtXla9O9MVBaj

Filed Under: Birth Story, CBAC, Cesarean, ICAN

CBAC Awareness Month – Katelyn’s CBAC Birth Story

February 19, 2021 by blog

I planned to deliver VBAC, but this is my CBAC story. I went in for my 38 week appointment and my blood pressure was high (a sign of pre-eclampsia). The nurse advised I go straight to L&D just to be sure. I was monitored for hours with not much change and finally admitted and expected to deliver the baby in order to treat the current situation. They told me it was more pre-pre-E and wanted to treat it before it got worse.

My bishop score wasn’t good enough to even talk about a gentle induction. The on call doctor advised a cesarean. I couldn’t even process it, it was that quick. I’m prepped, wheeled down to the operation room, given my spinal block, laid on the table and they begin. I feel everything and my anxiety isn’t helping. I’m trying to keep my mind busy. I don’t like that I’m awake and can feel them tugging and the pressure. I keep trying to focus on my baby being in my arms. It feels like forever. I feel like shutting down. Finally they say they are pulling him out. They pull the curtain down so I can see him. It was fast, I don’t remember seeing him very well, only him being whisked away. I don’t get immediate skin to skin, which makes me sad. I have never gotten the joy of holding my baby first, or getting that special moment of joy. I didn’t get to have immediate bonding with my first either and it ate me up for a while. I lay there patiently while they try to make him cry and check his vitals. My husband goes over to watch. I’m alone with my thoughts. I feel them begin to sew me up. Everyone has been so nice but I’m so hurt I didn’t get the delivery I hoped. It’s taken a long time both times to sew me up, (but it has to be done right)so I try to remain calm.. I try to remember its almost over.

Finally my husband brings our baby over for me to hold, sort of. It’s the most awkward way to hold a baby, laying down strapped to a table, but I wanted to. I end up giving him back to my husband to hold and I wait. Finally they say it’s over. I’m still in shock of the day and what it led to. We are taken to recovery where for the first time I get to hold our baby in a normal position. I’m beginning to feel the numbness leaving, which was different since I had an epidural previously and was numb for a longer period. I still can’t get over what happened, I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, I’m glad my baby is here, but it was honestly very hard to accept what happened.

Thank you for sharing your story with us, Katelyn.

Share your story with ICAN to be featured on our Instagram and Facebook! All cesarean and birth-after-cesarean stories are welcome: the difficult, the triumphant, the still-processing, and the stories which haven’t yet been shared. Sharing your birth story can be freeing, healing and profoundly powerful. It can bring others hope, comfort, and reassurance that they are not alone on their birth journey.

Submit your story HERE: https://airtable.com/shrJOtXla9O9MVBaj

Filed Under: Birth Story, CBAC, Cesarean

Malina’s CBAC Birth Story

November 18, 2020 by blog

Share your story with ICAN to be featured on our Instagram and Facebook! All cesarean and birth-after-cesarean stories are welcome: the difficult, the triumphant, the still-processing, and the stories which haven’t yet been shared. Sharing your birth story can be freeing, healing and profoundly powerful. It can bring others hope, comfort, and reassurance that they are not alone on their birth journey.

Submit your story HERE: https://airtable.com/shrJOtXla9O9MVBaj

My doctor signed off for me having a VBA2C, but at the last minute pressured me into a cesarean because of my baby’s size. He convinced me I wouldn’t be able to do it, but didn’t warn me about the dangers of having a 3rd surgery.

I ended up hospitalized & hooked up to a wound vac machine due to complications. I feel having a vaginal birth would have been less riskier & my doctor failed me.

Thank you for sharing your story with us, Malina. Congratulations on your new addition!

Filed Under: Birth Story, CBAC, Cesarean, Traumatic Birth

Jennifer’s CBAC Birth Story

October 20, 2020 by blog

Share your story with ICAN to be featured on our Instagram and Facebook! All cesarean and birth-after-cesarean stories are welcome: the difficult, the triumphant, the still-processing, and the stories which haven’t yet been shared. Sharing your birth story can be freeing, healing and profoundly powerful. It can bring others hope, comfort, and reassurance that they are not alone on their birth journey.

Submit your story HERE: https://airtable.com/shrJOtXla9O9MVBaj

From the moment I found out I was pregnant with Baby #2, I fought so hard for a VBAC. I hired a doula and switched care providers twice to find the support I needed—settling on an independent midwife for prenatal care and checking into triage to give birth with hospitalists.

Then, I delivered my precious Baby Boy #2 (aka Tank) via unplanned repeat Cesarean. However, because of the choices I made, I feel empowered and grateful.

I went into spontaneous labor New Year’s Day at 41 weeks, 3 days. I hadn’t had a “normal” labor experience with Baby #1, so this was my first time having regular contractions.

The birth stories I’d read reassured me all the sensations I felt were normal, and I settled in to labor at home as long as possible. I enjoyed being in the comfort of my own home, despite knowing I’d be delivering at the hospital.

In the afternoon, I noticed contractions were getting a little stronger (5-8 minutes apart and about 45 seconds long). Laying down wasn’t as comfortable anymore. I kept checking in with my midwife and doulas, who encouraged me to take a bath and rest as much as possible.

I was a little worried because it was New Year’s Day and my care team was scattered, but they assured me I’d have help when I needed it.

I had planned for an unmedicated labor and drew on all my strength from prenatal yoga to breathe through each contraction. (We opted not to take another birth class this time around, figuring I’d listen to my body and rely on our doulas. Not sure if I’d change that, in hindsight.)

My favorite position was kneeling draped over my yoga ball. Sitting and laying down were NOT my friends.

Around 7 PM, I was 5 cm dilated. My midwife said I could likely labor at home longer, but the frequency of contractions was worrying me. I was also experiencing a stabbing/burning sensation through my back with every contraction (back labor), and felt more comfortable heading in before things intensified.

I decided I would probably need an epidural. I’d wanted to avoid interventions, but I could tell I was tensing up and knew I needed to fully relax or I might inhibit my body’s ability to progress.

Afterwards, I was disappointed in myself for this choice. I wondered why my support team didn’t try to talk me out of the epidural. I’ve since learned that since I was talking calmly about the epidural BETWEEN contractions, they knew I was making an informed choice rather than an emotional one. That was a cool realization.

I had progressed to 7 cm by the time I arrived. I was happy I’d made it almost to transition. I still felt confident in my decision to get an epidural to relax and work with contractions. Not only was the back labor intense, but I was nervous about feeling the pushing part.

By early morning, I was 9 cm and 90% effaced! But I stayed there, and that’s where things started to slowly take a turn.

The biggest concern was the discovery of meconium in my fluid. Baby started having heart rate dips, so I received a low dose of pitocin and extra positioning to see if we could finish things up.

Baby wasn’t liking pitocin, and I started melting down, seeing some of the same signs from birth #1 that things might take a turn.

When the doctor on call realized there was only a small lip of cervix holding things up, I was told I could push. I was so sure they were about to call the surgery. However, I got the experience – terrifying and amazing- of trying to push out a baby.

I pushed on two separate tries. The on-call midwife coached me while I held my husband’s and doula’s hands. They even said I was doing a great job with it, despite being able to feel NOTHING thanks to the epidural. I’m proud of that.

Unfortunately, Baby’s head kept peeking out during pushes then disappearing again, and decelerations continued.

After 29 hours of labor, we made the decision for a C-section. By that time, I’d made my peace and realized my strength–I really had done it all. I’d been given every opportunity for success, but baby had other plans.

There was no pressure and everyone on staff was supportive and reassuring. I remember when things first started turning, as I lay there crying, the on-call midwife told me it was okay to be feeling emotional and reassured me that I had done well. She took the extra moment to honor all the baggage I had brought with me into that room, and I will never forget that.

The fact that everyone acknowledged baby’s safety was #1 while also allowing me every chance to succeed and honoring my feelings made all the difference in the world. I delivered my 10 lb. 5 oz. Tank a short time later. We still can’t believe he was that big!

Tank’s real name means “healer,” and he certainly healed my heart through this experience. I realized we don’t always get the birth we want; we get the birth we need.

Through birth, we learn that things don’t always go according to plan. We learn acceptance. We learn how strong we can be. We are humbled. And as long as we can look back and say, “I did everything in my power to stack the odds in my favor,” and “I was seen, heard, and respected,” we find peace at the end of our birth journeys.

Congratulations, Jennifer, and thank you for sharing your story with us!

Filed Under: Birth Story, CBAC, Cesarean, Empowered Birth, ICAN

Lauren’s CBAC Birth Story

September 15, 2020 by blog

Share your story with ICAN to be featured on our Instagram and Facebook! All cesarean and birth-after-cesarean stories are welcome: the difficult, the triumphant, the still-processing, and the stories which haven’t yet been shared. Sharing your birth story can be freeing, healing and profoundly powerful. It can bring others hope, comfort, and reassurance that they are not alone on their birth journey.

Submit your story HERE: https://airtable.com/shrJOtXla9O9MVBaj

My labour started on the 18th of February after a week of pre- labour, I presented to MFAU that evening to get an idea of where things were at, I had a VE and speculum that confirmed amniotic fluid and that I was 1cm and fully effaced. I went home to labour.

Rough night as things picked up, when the shower and counter pressure were no longer able to soothe me I decided to head back to birth suite at 9am on the 19th.

Got gas, fitball and shower going, enjoyed this combo for close to 5 hrs. Partner was incredible applying counter pressure whenever I needed. Had a VE @ 3pm and was 4-5cm dilated with bulging waters. Waters were broken and things quickly escalated, returned to shower where meconium in waters came out. Had everyone panicked about baby but I knew she was okay. Intermittent Doppler continued.

Pain went through the roof when my body started to push too early and I could not bear the intense pressure anymore, I wanted to make sure I wasn’t getting too swollen so got an epidural at which point a scalpel clip was placed ensuring baby was happy too. 

I was checked at 9pm and fully dilated, I pushed for 3 hours before OB recommended forceps assisted delivery. I wasn’t keen and actually resisted any decision making for close to 2hrs.

We got to theatre after 2am on the 20th. When I was laid on the table baby moved, she had moved from halfway down the birth canal to back up and transverse. Perhaps she sensed something.

Decision was made to proceed with a c section.

Adelaide Claire was born 2:42am on the 20th.

Healthy and happy 9lbz 11oz AGPARS 10 and 10.

It was after being shown my daughter over the curtain that things turned to me, my BP dropped to 50/25. I lost 3.5 litres of blood. The senior OB who had decided to hang back just in case jumped in and let me and hubby know what was happening, he advised my scar had ruptured when they went to get her out but I’d also ruptured vertically through my cervix and most of my vagina. At this point they were bringing baby over to me I yelled out “no, take her to my mum” hubby looked at me held my hand and reassured me he wasn’t going anywhere. We had agreed to let baby go to my mum should anything happen. 

I was shaking uncontrollably the whole time from the epidural and felt calm and numb from the low blood pressure. Unknown to me at the time I was being jabbed in my arms all over they had to access an artery in my arm to get an accurate reading of BP. By this stage two units of blood arrived for me, hubby was asked to manually assist the transfusions. All senior consultants were being called in to assist. Hubby was then told I needed to go under general anesthesia ASAP. We kissed and he left. Just before going under I turned to the anaesthetist and asked her to just make sure I wake up.

After 4 hours I was out of surgery and taken to ICU, intubated and my hubby and mum kissed me and went home to sleep.

I woke in ICU at 8:30am. 

I have never been so happy to open my eyes.

While my experience after birth was traumatic, I still had an empowering, positive TOLAC. I wouldn’t have done anything differently. 

Congratulations, Lauren, and thank you for sharing your story with us!

Filed Under: Birth Story, CBAC, Cesarean, Emergency

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