International Cesarean Awareness Network

Education, Support, & Advocacy for Birth Justice & Healing

Veronica’s HBAC Birth Story

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Share your story with ICAN to be featured on our Instagram and Facebook! All cesarean and birth-after-cesarean stories are welcome: the difficult, the triumphant, the still-processing, and the stories which haven’t yet been shared. Sharing your birth story can be freeing, healing and profoundly powerful. It can bring others hope, comfort, and reassurance that they are not alone on their birth journey.

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(HBAC 20 months after a planned cesarean for frank breech during peak of COVID shelter in place)

Labor started on Tuesday evening after very light contractions since the night before. Surges were 5-7 min apart but slowed overnight to every ten minutes. By Wednesday afternoon my labor shifted to be more “active labor” for another 26 hours. (It all felt active to me). I was in a multi day start and stop labor and I could tell baby wasn’t descending. It was a physical, mental, emotional rollercoaster.

My birth doula came on Tuesday night at midnight. (She was actually a backup doula because my main doula who I had been working with had had a fluke fever within the two weeks prior of birth for one night, so according to the rules with COVID precautions she wasn’t allowed at the birth). Our backup doula had to spend a lot of her time just helping with our toddler because we couldn’t have a specific person in our home for childcare due to COVID as well, and I wanted him at home for the birth and not with another family due to COVID precaution.

On Thursday am, we called the midwives (who we thought we were going to call either of the two nights before but didn’t because labor slowed back down so much.) They arrived at 8:20 am on Thursday April 9. I was given a bag of IV fluids to help me replenish since I’d been going for so long with labor.   The midwives determined that the baby’s head may be a bit posterior with the baby at an LOT position instead of LOA position. We needed to shift him. So while getting the IV, I used a peanut ball and did the exaggerated side lying pose on my right side to turn him. I could feel him moving and contractions were painful in that position but turns out it worked. I had two requested cervical checks that morning but I chose to not be told what my dilation was at either. I wanted to trust my body to know when it was ready to push without having outside guidance telling me and I didn’t want the additional mental challenge of knowing certain numbers of dilation and feeling defeated if they weren’t “high enough” or whatnot.

The marathon I had been running felt like such a mental and emotional challenge when I’d get up to 3-5 minute contractions consistently, thinking I was near the end, but then not…because it wouldn’t stay there. After such a long labor, I mentally wouldn’t be able to hear that I was “only” at a certain dilation. I also had the knowledge that those numbers don’t necessarily correspond to lengths of time to completion. Birth is not a linear process. (This is one of the main reasons I planned for a home birth with midwifery care. I knew my labor and birth wouldn’t be put on a timeline or be forced unnecessary interventions like what happens in the majority of maternal care policies and just the cultural norms.) The mental “mind fuck” of knowing the dilation numbers wasn’t a risk I wanted to take after an already very challenging 2 days of labor at home (physically and mentally).

I came to find out after the fact that at 8:30 am on Thursday I was around 4 cm dilated and sometime around noon I was 9/10 cm and by 2:30 pm I was spontaneously pushing. I remember right before pushing that I told my midwife I wanted to but I was afraid And I don’t think I can labor for ten more labors, and she just replied with “listen to your body.” She didn’t say yes, do it, no, don’t. I had to trust that it was ok and truly just listen in to myself and my power and move past the doubt that I was just in that same start/stop labor as before. Once I started, the midwives started moving much faster in the bedroom prepping all of the materials needed, as I literally was birthing probably in the most inconvenient spot in our bedroom, blocking being able to walk to and from in the room. I could feel him moving down and at some point they said they saw the head and I was able to touch it. I was on all fours with a birth ball, pulling on my husband’s arms, next to the birth tub which we only used a few times during the two day labor.

Baby was born 35 minutes later. It happened quickly and I had my husband held captive on the other side of the birth ball, pulling on him so he couldn’t catch the baby as planned. The student midwife (who was awesome) caught him and pulled him up under me as I sat back to pull him up. They helped us onto the edge of the bed as they were checking him. I birthed the placenta not long afterwards. Our first son was able to join us soon afterwards to meet his little brother.  

So, it was an extremely long labor which gave me a great opportunity for mental strength and a very short, spontaneous pushing phase which taught me full on personal power and trust. I should add, little man also surprised us with a nuchal hand (hand presenting alongside his head as he came out). I am so very grateful to my fantastic midwife team (Michelle Freund, LM and Christina Evans, student midwife) and my extremely loving and supportive husband. The long labor was hard on him too but he never gave up on me or us. He understood my desires for a spontaneous normal birth for my VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) and he showed up for all aspects of the prenatal care and supportive role before, during and after labor. I am so proud of the team our family of four has become. I’m so grateful I was able to give birth to my son at home with a normal, spontaneous birth. I planned a homebirth way before COVID hit but I was even more grateful to have planned one when it did. Although it wasn’t without stress, I felt safer from interventions or policies that I didn’t agree with. I now have experience having a son by scheduled cesarean in a hospital with no labor, and a long labor, nuchal hand HBAC. Grateful for the blessings and lessons with each. 

Congratulations, Veronica, and thank you for sharing your story with us!

Hilary’s Unassisted HBA2C Birth Story

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Share your story with ICAN to be featured on our Instagram and Facebook! All cesarean and birth-after-cesarean stories are welcome: the difficult, the triumphant, the still-processing, and the stories which haven’t yet been shared. Sharing your birth story can be freeing, healing and profoundly powerful. It can bring others hope, comfort, and reassurance that they are not alone on their birth journey.

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Birth Story: The unassisted home birth of Aspen Juliet after 2 cesareans

Back story: My first baby was a csection due to being breech. I simply didn’t know any better. I didn’t know that a breech baby can be born vaginally, even though I am a nurse. I went in to labor, labored at home as much as possible, and then went to the hospital and told them she was breech so I had to have a csection.

My second pregnancy, I was set on having a VBAC. I switched providers to hospital midwives in hopes that these midwives would give me better care during birth. (Spoiler, they were actually “medwives.”) I induced labor myself because I was impatient. Labor started nicely and we headed to the hospital once I felt that the pain was getting to be too much. At the hospital I labored some and eventually started using the nitrous gas for pain relief When my water broke, the pain intensified greatly. I said I couldn’t do it and I either wanted IV pain meds or the epidural. The nurse told me that the CRNA was available now and right outside my door and who knows when she would be available again to do the epidural. I felt pressured and caved and got the epidural. As I was getting the epidural, my body was pushing involuntarily. Of course once I got the epidural they laid me on my back, which I told them I didn’t want. Soon after I got the epidural, the baby went into distress. After 2 hours of baby having late heart decelerations they came in and informed me of the decelerations. They basically said at this point that my options were A) a csection or B) a csection.

I was fully effaced and fully dilated and baby was at 3+ station. They said baby was too high. They wouldn’t even allow me to push. (Not to mention that shift change was soon, but they would never admit that that was why they pushed for the c-section).

During this second c-section, I had a uterine window that ruptured during surgery. The incision also tore 5cm down to the cervix during surgery. After the c-section, the doctor told me that I could never have a vaginal birth.

With my third pregnancy, I would not take no for answer. I would get my VBA2C even if it was the last thing that I did. When I found out I was pregnant, I called every birthing center in the region in search of someone who would take me as a patient. I consulted with an OB doctor at 8 weeks pregnant while searching for a midwife.

After an extensive search without much luck, I finally found a birth center that would take me. At 21 weeks the midwife, my husband, and I went in for an anatomy scan with her attending physician (the same physician that I saw when I was 8 weeks pregnant.). This doctor was very nice but said that he was not comfortable with me birthing outside of the hospital because of my uterine window that ruptured during surgery with my second c-section and the 5cm tear of the incision also from the second c-section.

At this point the midwife said that she could not allow me to birth at the birth center. She was willing to do co-care with the OB doctor, but I had no interest in paying her $5000 plus paying the doctor’s fee and the hospital fee. By the way, the baby could not have looked more perfect on the anatomy scan, and the placenta was in the fundus which was great!

After this appointment, I started my search over and began looking for any midwife in the area who would take me as their patient. I interviewed with a midwife pair and we planned to birth in a hotel DIRECTLY across the street from the hospital. They too had the same overseeing OB doctor and he wasn’t okay with that option either. So I ended up seeing this OB doctor until I was 32 weeks pregnant. Around 28-30 weeks along, I started feeling God working on my heart, pushing me towards having my baby at home. God was telling me that everything would be okay. He was telling me that I could have the birth that my soul needed. After years of research on birth and VBAC I realized that my best chance at achieving my healing VBA2C birth would be at home, away from doctors and hospitals and unnecessary protocols and arbitrary timelines.

So I decided on an unassisted homebirth. It was the best decision I could have made! I was getting so tired of hearing people tell me what THEY were going to LET ME do with MY body. I decided to take charge of my own birth! My husband took lots of convincing, however. We had several discussions and arguments about my choice to birth at home. He was afraid of the what-if scenarios. I understood his fear but I knew that my unassisted home birth was something that I needed to do. I told him that I was having the baby at home whether he was there or not. I told him I’d love to have him there but his presence was not required. He told me he wouldn’t let me do it alone. So, we spent a lot of time preparing and specifically educating my husband so that he would feel prepared and not be fearful or panic during the birth.

Birth story: The gender was a surprise! Baby spent the entire third trimester head down on the right side (ROA) with occasional changes to either transverse or head down on the left side (LOA) but would go right back to ROA with spinning babies exercises.

On Thursday 10/17 I was 40 weeks and 4 days. Surges started around 11am. They were few and far between and I didn’t really realize they were there until about 1:45pm. I watched the Spinning Babies parent’s class video and did the calf lift exercise from the video quickly before I had to head to my chiropractor appointment. At the appointment I realized that baby was now on the left side (LOA). I was so thankful as I knew I was in early labor! Surges continued from every 15 minutes to every 45 minutes for the rest of the day. I went for a walk to the park with my husband and my kids to encourage the surges, doing curb walking there and back. We put the kids to bed and I watched the spinning babies video again with my husband. We did some of the exercises from the video to encourage engagement and dilation. I then went to bed at around 10:15pm.

Friday 10/18, 40 weeks 5 days.

Surges continued throughout the night, interrupting sleep, about every 12 minutes. I had to concentrate and breathe through the surges while sleeping in between them. I got up at 4:55am since the surges were simply getting too uncomfortable to lie down through anymore.The surges were about 5-8 minutes apart, and though they varied in intensity, they were not too intense.

Around 7:15am, my husband and I went out for breakfast. I had to breathe through the surges but again, they weren’t terrible and I was fine between them.

When we got back home, I went to the bathroom at 8:48am and saw that I had lost my mucus plug and that it had a strand of bloody show. Things were happening and I was excited!

After losing my plug, the surges spaced out some so I went to lay down and rest for a bit. At about 10:30am surges were 6-8 minutes apart and started picking up in intensity. I was supposed to let the photographer know when surges were 3-5 minutes apart, so we weren’t there yet.

I wanted to make sure that I was doing everything I could to get baby to engage and dilate the cervix and do all the right maneuvers to have the perfect home birth. My husband found a link on the Spinning Babies website about doing a maneuver called the abdominal lift and tuck where you and a partner lift your abdomen up and inward with your hands while kind of tucking in your butt for 10 surges. I ate a chicken sandwich to recharge my energy, it was delicious, and then we did the abdominal lift and tucks for 11 surges since we kept missing some when I would go to the bathroom. I would go to the bathroom after each surge so that my bladder wouldn’t get in baby’s way. We started the abdominal lift and tucks at about noon. Those surges were getting pretty intense but all was still well between the surges, and they were still about 6 minutes apart. (I believe they were likely closer together than I realized since I wasn’t tracking the surges I was having in the bathroom because I had left my phone in the other room).

After that, I saw a video that in order to ensure that baby descends during labor, do lunges with your left leg lifted on a chair (if baby is in the LOA position) during surges So I did that for a couple more surges.

Then at 1:13 I lost some more plug. At 1:18 I had some very light leaking of translucent, odorless, pink-tinged fluid. There was a small trickle with the next surge. My water broke! I texted my photographer to come and had my husband start filling the birth tub.

While my husband was in the other room working on getting the pool filled, it became quite clear that This Was It! I was about to have my baby! I realized that I would not get the water birth that I wanted and I would not get this sweet labor or birth on video like I had longed for! But there wasn’t time for me to care about that. I was about to have my baby!

I was leaning into my husband and then got on the floor on my knees leaning over our ottoman. With each surge I SCREAMED and screamed and clawed at my husband’s arm as my body pushed and I pushed with it. Between the surges, I begged God to help me and had my husband give me cold water to drink and had him put the cold water on my face and neck. It was incredible to feel my baby coming down through the birth canal. As the baby was crowning I could feel all the tearing and pain. I reached down and felt with my hand. To me it did not feel like a head. It felt too slimy and squishy. I told my husband to look. He said he didn’t know what it was. I told him to tell me what it looked like. He said he thought it might be the cord. I told him to get me a mirror so I could look. He brought a mirror attached to a huge picture frame that would never work. I knew it wasn’t an arm or a leg. I thought then maybe it was the placenta. I told him to call 911. (We were both clearly too dumb to have him take a picture but that is neither here nor there haha). I never truly believed that what I was feeling was the placenta, since the placenta had been in the fundus the entire pregnancy and baby had been head down and engaged, but in the throes of labor I was not thinking clearly and I didn’t want to take any chances.

My husband called 911 as I continued to scream and push. Just then, the photographer showed up, and I yelled at her to come and tell me if it was the head or not.

Well of course, it was the head! She said “The head is out!” I kept pushing. The photographer told me to grab the baby but I told her I couldn’t grab the baby. I was working so hard to push baby out and holding myself up on the ottoman. I kept pushing and out came baby, head first and perfect!

The photographer actually caught the baby from behind me (which of course was not the plan but we improvised) and handed the baby to my husband. They then passed the baby up to me. I grabbed the baby and looked to see the gender. A girl!!! I couldn’t believe that I had just pushed out my baby and that she was a girl! It was AMAZING!!!

The ambulance showed up just after baby was born and checked us both out. She was absolutely perfect and I was a successful, victorious birth warrior! The placenta came about 10 to 15 minutes after she was born.

Aspen Juliet was born at 1:57pm, weighing about 10 lbs, 20 inches long, after about 35 minutes of pushing! We were so blessed to have a beautiful, healing, restorative, cleansing home vaginal birth and to have a completely healthy and perfect little squishy baby!

We did decide to go to the hospital to get checked out. I had some extensive tears that were bleeding and that needed to be stitched. We were going to go to the hospital anyway to get checked out in hopes that that would make getting a birth certificate and Social Security card easier for baby.

So we didn’t get the much anticipated water birth and we didn’t get the actual birth on film like I REALLY wanted, BUT I got to have my triumphant, healing, cleansing, restorative vaginal birth that I knew in my soul that I could have!

Congratulations, Hilary, and thank you for sharing your story with us!

Megan’s HBA3C Birth Story

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Share your story with ICAN to be featured on our Instagram and Facebook! All cesarean and birth-after-cesarean stories are welcome: the difficult, the triumphant, the still-processing, and the stories which haven’t yet been shared. Sharing your birth story can be freeing, healing and profoundly powerful. It can bring others hope, comfort, and reassurance that they are not alone on their birth journey.

Submit your story HERE: https://airtable.com/shrJOtXla9O9MVBaj

Megan shares her HBA3C birth story. Thank you for sharing your story for all to read!

William Tyler was born after 40 hours of labor at my midwife’s house. He was my first vaginal birth after three Cesareans!

On Wednesday the 6th, my husband had left town for work. I felt like I should tell him to stay but nothing was happening so he had to go. Then, of course, as the evening progressed, I kept having the occasional, strong contraction. I knew this baby was gonna come soon, so by 9 that night I made the decision to drive the two hours to Spokane and stay in a hotel for the night. I knew I didn’t want to be in active labor in the car. An hour into the drive, my contractions started coming 10 minutes apart and I was starting to vocalize a bit through them. (I am not the silent labor type, haha.)

I stopped by my midwife’s house to get a quick check before heading to the hotel. My blood pressure was still high (it had been for a few weeks but labs were clear and everything else was fine and it was stable) so I made sure to get my electrolyte drink to help control it. She sent me off with her peanut ball and after a quick stop at the store I made it to my hotel by midnight. With contractions 10 minutes apart all night I didn’t sleep. At 6 am on the 7th, little man’s due date, I got breakfast, took a shower, then left the hotel around 7:30. At this point I called my birth team to head to the midwife’s house. (My husband and birth photographer were 2 hours away while my doula was an hour away.)

I have to say that whole first day was pretty enjoyable. Contractions were between 6 and 10 minutes all day though they did increase in strength. My doula and photographer and husband made it a fun day. We were laughing and watching movies between contractions and having a good time. 

I found that the birth pool was my saving grace. When I got too tired or the contractions were coming too fast and strong and I needed a break, if I got in the pool they would space out so I could rest and even get little micro naps. By that evening my birth team needed to sleep so I labored throughout the night, laying down when I needed to. I don’t know how anyone slept through my yelling!

The morning of the 8th came and things were getting quite serious. (I was disappointed he didn’t come on his due date!) My husband got breakfast from Denny’s and it was a strawberry crepe. It was seriously the best thing I’ve ever eaten.

At 6:30 that morning I got my one and only check. I was 5-6 centimeters and felt like I had so long to go since I’d already been in labor so long already. My team assured me that that was great and I was doing great.

At this point I felt like my contractions were on top of each other and I was starting to lose a little control and panic at how much they hurt. I did a little crying and needed to get in the pool to gain control again and rest. After I got out, I decided next time I got in, I wouldn’t get out until the baby was born. 

For the next few hours or so I was having to bear down during contractions. I was excited cause it meant baby was coming down and would be born soon. When I couldn’t take it anymore, I knew I needed to get back in the pool. I was actively pushing during these contractions. I was starting to get scared at the force of my body and feeling like I couldn’t possibly do it, but also knowing I was way past the point of no return. In between one of those contractions I remember asking my husband if we had told anyone to feed our dogs.

My water broke during a contraction and immediately after I was taken over by the fetal ejection reflex. Let me tell you, I didn’t think it was possible for the body to handle that level of intensity and pain, and the sounds that came out of me were ones I didn’t know I could make. After several of these contractions, he started to crown. Ring of fire, baby! I held his head as it was born. Feeling his body wiggle and rotate while still inside me was such a strange feeling! I was kneeling while pushing but pulled up one leg after his head was born. One final contraction and his body slid out. I pulled him onto my chest then helped back into a sitting position. He cried right away. His back was covered in a thick layer of vernix so I sat there and rubbed it in while he cleared his lungs.

The placenta detached within minutes and the pressure was awful on my tailbone so I got out to deliver it. I sat on the birth stool and guided it out myself. It was such a relief! After I got settled in the bed and William was latching, I slept. I didn’t know I slept until they told me he had been born for 2 hours and I couldn’t believe it! We got a few pictures with the placenta and then my husband cut the cord so we could do measurements. 7 lbs 9 oz and 21 inches. Everyone was surprised at how big he was! (I had two previous IUGR babies)

Looking back I can say it was a beautiful, incredible journey. It wasn’t peaceful and calm. It was raw, and primal. And that’s ok. Because while birth looks different for everyone, it is still beautiful.

Autumn’s HBAC Birth Story

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Share your story with ICAN to be featured on our Instagram and Facebook! All cesarean and birth-after-cesarean stories are welcome: the difficult, the triumphant, the still-processing, and the stories which haven’t yet been shared. Sharing your birth story can be freeing, healing and profoundly powerful. It can bring others hope, comfort, and reassurance that they are not alone on their birth journey.

Submit your story HERE: https://airtable.com/shrJOtXla9O9MVBaj

Autumn shares her HBAC birth story. Thank you for sharing your story for all to read!

“March 2nd – I had woken up after having a few random contractions through the night. I woke up around 7am to nothing but my back was hurting like period cramps pretty much on and off all day. Around 2:30 pm I started feeling contractions. I decided to make me and the kids a pizza while we waited for my husband to come home from work. My husband got home around 3ish. Contractions picked up a bit once he got home, like my body and baby knew, “Okay you don’t have to be solely in charge now, let’s do this”. When I was up and moving they were every 2-3 minutes lasting about a minute. If I was just relaxing they were every 5 minutes lasting about 40 seconds. Our neighbor asked us if we wanted to let the kids play outside for a bit, which thinking it would be a bit still, I said of course. I decided to take a quick shower first though around 4. At 4:30 we all went outside to let the kids play. I was having contractions every 2-3 minutes at this point. I ended up going into my basement because I couldn’t socialize and needed to breathe through them at this point. I called my mom/doula and had 2 contractions on the phone with her and she said, “Yeah you sound like you’re in it right now, let me know when you leave”. I called my midwife next and let her know what was going on. As the next contraction hit I knew we had to go. So I opened the door and called my husband and told him we needed to get going that things were getting intense fast. So he told everyone it was time and they had to leave and got the kids ready. I threw my cold drinks in our cooler bag and grabbed my birth ball. My husband threw it all in the car and we got on the road around 5:15pm. I texted my photographer, midwife and mom and let them know we were headed out. We got to my midwives house around 6pm.

At this point I completely felt like I was at my breaking point and done. I would moan “low” through my contractions. I held my son for a bit through a couple of them while my team got the birth book started and everything ready and set up. I moved into the living room and tried leaning over my birth ball but that HURT more so I just stood and rocked over the back of a chair. I ended up putting my headphones in and throwing on some meditation music that had lots of low tones. I was getting good breaks in between contractions but when they hit it was HARD and I would moan or growl through them. At some point my dad came and picked up our soon. Our daughter stayed with us and would hug me or rub my belly.

Around maybe 6:45pm I was growling and grunting through contractions and there was a lot of pressure. My midwife asked if I was pushing and I said no, she and my mom chuckled to each other because they knew I was. But I said no because *I* wasn’t. It was my body. Finally I had enough and stripped down and got into the pool around 7pm.

As soon and I got in my contractions shifted and each one my body was pushing my baby down and out and I could feel all the pressure of his head coming through my birth canal. I broke for a bit saying how I couldn’t do it and just needed a break to breathe. My mom told me I was and had to. My husband reminded me that I was and that this was the point of him coming. My daughter said to me, “Mommy you have to push the baby out now. He has to come out, you can do it”.

A few more contractions and the ring of fire happened and I yelled, “It burned!” (LOL). I felt down though and his head was right there behind a bag of waters. Another contraction and his head was out, with my waters breaking right before. There was a pause before the next contraction to push his body out. Fetal Ejection Reflex is so strong and so crazy! Baby boy S was born at 7:10pm.

We sat in the tub for a few minutes before getting out and moving to the bed. On the bed we delivered the placenta. I did consent to a shot of Pitocin because I was having a little trouble delivering the placenta. Once it was out everything was fine though. No tearing and no hemorrhages. Our daughter was with us the whole time and cut the cord once it was white. It was such a fast birth and took me by surprise especially because of how quick I went from, “Okay I’m laboring” to “Okay he’s coming” and because I was so aware between contractions of what was going on. Baby S is perfect though. 10/10 APGAR weighing 8lbs 6oz and 22in long with a 14.25cm head. He is the calmest, happiest baby we’ve had. “

Congratulations, Autumn and family, on your newest addition! Thank you for sharing your story!