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Birth Story: Elisabeth’s VBA2C

January 25, 2018 by blog 6 Comments

Originally published 2012


andrew-branch-191920On the day of my 2nd cesarean section (C/S) I was nervous, anxious and just wanting to get it all over with. I had asked my OB about the possibility of a vaginal birth after cesarean (VBAC). She said she was supportive but also told me of her colleague she had just sectioned who (with her expertise) had chosen a repeat cesarean section (RCS) over a VBAC. With no encouragement and little knowledge on my part, I agreed to the RCS. I remember lying on the operating table. My arms strapped down. I had a mini-panic attack and knew right then that I would NOT be going through this again. Ever. So, for the next three years, I had NO desire to ever be pregnant again. Then, baby fever hit and hit hard!

With my first baby, I had decided to go about labor all-natural. No pain medicines. I thought just choosing that was enough. But before I knew it, this snowball effect of standard hospital interventions smothered my plans in IV’s, routine Pitocin to augment labor even though I was in active labor on my own, ephedrine to counter-act my reactions to the Pitocin, artificial rupture of my waters (AROM), epidural to counteract the unnatural Pitocin induced contractions, stalled labor, distressed baby, emergency C/S. The recovery was no fun. I took the prescribed pain meds and have little memory of the first week with my new baby. I healed well and quick but it was not the birth I had envisioned for my first baby.

Fast forward to 2011, we finally, after 4 years of trying to get pregnant, found out in December that baby #3 was on his way! After the initial celebrations settled down, I began to pour myself into all the resources I could get my hands on about natural childbirth and VBAC’s – I was doing my homework this time around! I had my Husband’s full-support as he wanted a better birthing experience as much as I did.

We hit many obstacles! After consultations with several OBs and a midwife, I was told over and over again that I was a great candidate for a VBA2C (vaginal birth after two C/S) but that hospital policy prevented me from being allowed a trial of labor (TOL). At 18 weeks gestation, I finally found a midwife group and get this… a hospital (!) who would allow me to attempt a VBA2C!!! I also found an excellent Doula who had a high VBAC success rate!

At 1:00 pm, at 39 weeks and 1 day, my water broke! An hour later the contractions his hard and fast! We were 1.5 hours from the hospital and thankfully my dear Husband completely ignored me when I assured him we had plenty of time before heading to the hospital! By the time he loaded up the MommyMobile and we got on the road is right when my contractions hit! When we got stopped in traffic I remember telling him there was no way we were going to make it to the hospital! But, God got us there safe and sound and just in time!

After some hassles through triage, I was in my room pretty quickly. Somehow when I called ahead the staff had alerted the midwives about a different patient coming in so for a while they didn’t realize I was their VBA2C patient! This blip allowed me the opportunity to strip down and jump in the tub (that my Doula started filling for me immediately) and avoid the baseline monitoring they wanted on the baby and the IV which was mandatory for VBAC patients!

The water didn’t bring the degree of relief that I had anticipated but the thought of getting out of the tub was unbearable. The pain was more intense than I had anticipated. At some point, they realized I was indeed their VBAC patient and the room was buzzing with people. I tuned them all out. I remember an OB coming in to get my consent to a C/S “just in case”. I just ignored her for as long as I could and continued tuning everyone out. At one point the pain was too much. I remember talking to God and just resting on Him. At this point, I knew people were around me but I had just checked out and no one had any effect on me. I was just resting in God’s strength because I didn’t have enough on my own. (My husband later told me he thought I had fallen asleep!) All of a sudden, my body just took over and started pushing. It hadn’t even dawned on me what was happening until I heard the midwife call out, “Is she pushing?”. That snapped me out of my God time and the energy in the room consumed me again. That darn OB was still there trying to get me to sign that C/S form despite my best intentions to ignore her.

The midwife checked me and I was complete. My body was expelling my baby anyhow so it didn’t really matter to me at that time if I was complete or not! As per hospital policy, I was only allowed to labor in the tub, but not allowed to deliver in the tub, so the midwife began trying to coax me out of the tub. I ignored her, yelled at her, refused but then finally gave in. My Doula and husband helped me out and dressed me in the gown I had packed.

On the way to the bed, that pesky OB handed me that form to sign again… I scribbled something on it but I doubt it resembled a signature at all. Before making it to the bed, a pressure wave hit so hard I just lowered myself down the ground. Squatting was all I could accomplish at that moment. The nurses and midwives were in a rush to get me on that bed and hooked up to the monitors and IV’s. But, after the way my first labor went downhill with the onslaught of interventions, I refused everything! They monitored baby the old fashioned way while I labored beside the bed.

After a bit, my legs felt too weak and my Doula suggested laboring on the bed but on my right side (I was not about to labor on my back)! My body was still pushing through all of this. The nurse kept trying to get me to agree to the IV all the way up until I was delivering the baby which I continually refused. I’m not sure how many pushes but after about 45 minutes of pushing, I succeeded in birthing my baby! My body was not broken. It knew exactly what to do when left to its inherent devices!

Sweet baby Elias Walker was born at 5:27 pm, just 2.5 hours after we made it to the hospital! No pain medicines. No interventions. He was born the old-fashioned way! I had succeeded at my VBA2C!!! After giving the umbilical cord time to quit pulsating on its own, my dear husband got to cut the cord!

I have to add that through the entire labor, even with contractions right on top of each, no break in between, I never once feared a uterine rupture. To me, that was one of my top reasons for hiring a Doula. I wanted someone who was on MY team, had a vested interested in my success who also knew enough to assure me when everything I was experiencing was completely normal but also would alert me if something I was feeling was NOT normal! Janet was my rock and my husband and I are eternally grateful for her role in VBA2C!

I have absolutely no regrets! What I gained from this experience, other than some frustrations over hospital “policy” and “standard care”, is that our bodies know how to birth our babies. Yes, there are exceptions to that rule, but I truly believe that when we set all the inventions that get in our body’s way aside, it is fully capable to do what God granted it the ability to do – bring life into this world!

As a Childbirth Educator In-Training, I am so thankful for the personal experience I will be able to share with families planning the birth of their babies!

Filed Under: Birth Story, VBAC Tags: Birth Story, VBAC, VBAMC

Birth Story: Shara’s VBA2C

January 23, 2018 by blog Leave a Comment

Originally published 2012; View Shara’s birth video here


alex-pasarelu-223684My first two labors began with natural birthing dreams, each lasted 24 hours long and for different reasons (neither were medical emergencies) ended in the birth of our boys via c-section surgeries. After my second c-section, I had a very difficult time finding peace and healing from the emotional pain I felt—having “failed” twice. I decided that if at all possible, I would do everything I could to have a vaginal delivery after two c-sections (VBA2C) for my next baby.

I found out I was pregnant with baby #3 in early April; my 2nd baby boy was only 7 months old. As the surprise faded into excitement, I began the hunt for a good provider who would be supportive of a VBA2C. After many phone calls and questions, I realized it would not be possible to find willing midwives or OB practices who were willing/able to support my birthing goals. The awesome midwives that I saw with our last baby could not legally take on a VBA2C patient.

I met with a local OB and talked to him about my options. Their policies expected a woman to schedule her third c/s at 39 weeks, not go into labor, and follow their prescribed routines. I asked him what would happen if I waited to go into labor, or if I went into labor before the scheduled c/s. He shrugged and suggested that he would then be helping me deliver a baby instead of performing a surgery. I relinquished myself to the reality that was going to be as good as I could find.

Within a few months, my husband received a job offer in another state and we moved our little family. Again, I began my search for a supportive birthing team for my upcoming birth. By this time we found out we were having a girl and I had decided I needed to be mentally/emotionally ok with another c-section since it appeared as if that is what my options were. As I searched online, the local ICAN group had lots of suggestions for me. One suggestion was a home birth, which sounded lovely, but really wasn’t an option for us (my husband’s career is in risk management—you can imagine how those conversations would go).

I was impressed with the ICAN group’s support, interest, and willingness to share ideas. I quickly learned that we had moved to a VERY mother-focused birthing area of the country. I got in touch with a local doula, and she was very eager to help me sort out my thoughts, fears, concerns, questions, and feelings. She encouraged me in my search and suggested I travel 45 minutes to an OB who is known locally as “an OB in midwife’s clothing.” I was told he would be my best option if he would be willing to take me as his patient. At that point, I had almost resigned myself to c-section being my only option, but I was curious to see what this OB thought and run through my main concerns with him.

My main concerns were: 1) the length of time between births, 2) very long labor only to end in c/s, 3) getting past 6 cm (since I never had before), 4) pushing, 5) my mother’s ruptured uterus (causing an emergency c/s & resulting in my brother’s disability), and 6) avoiding interventions from “hospital policies.”  My fears had, at this point, outweighed my earlier determination to experience a natural, vaginal delivery.

When I met with Dr. H, he listened to me share my previous two birth stories; he nodded through my concerns and fears and asked questions to assess my situation. He responded to my concerns and explained that every birth includes certain risks, but there was no reason that I shouldn’t attempt a VBA2C. He also told me that a top reason for the failure of attempted VBACs was the laboring mother losing her mental/emotional focus. His challenge for me was to figure out what I really wanted and then channel that desire into my focus. He said he would support me in whichever birth was my goal—given that my pregnancy continued to be problem-free and the baby was ok.

I left his office with renewed energy and interest in my VBA2C goals. I still was hesitant because of my fears but I was hopeful—this was my opportunity—this doctor was completely positive and supportive! I felt a huge weight was lifted off of my shoulders. I had options and support—it felt amazing.

I told everyone about my “amazing OB in midwives’ clothing” and raved about the possibilities. During subsequent visits, I found out I could labor in a tub, have freedom of movement (with monitoring), eat what I wanted, wear what I wanted, delay the cord cutting, breastfeed immediately after birth, and…have a water birth! I toured the hospital facilities and found them to be fantastically supportive of VBACs, water birth, and other natural birth friendly options. They did require regular monitoring, but besides that, I was free to do as my laboring body wished. I was so excited, I felt like all of my labor & delivery dreams were coming true!

I found a doula trainer and trainee who were willing to join our birthing team and we began the work of getting my mind really, truly on board with my VBAC goals. I skimmed through my collection of birthing preparation books—about birth plans, midwives, doulas, hypnobirthing, Lamaze, Bradley, etc. Upon my doula’s suggestion, I promptly ordered & read Ina May Gaskin’s book, Ina May’s Guide To Childbirth. I believe this book really helped to take me to the next level—the place I needed to be to turn my natural birthing dreams into reality. In her book, Ina May explains the importance of the mind-body connection and the beauty and abilities of a woman’s body. I highly recommend the book for anyone preparing for childbirth.

I read dozens of successful VBA2C stories online, watched birth videos, and started visualizing my own successful labor and delivery. I talked with my doulas about pain relief options and positive affirmations. I typed up a list of affirmations (some from online lists, some from my own heart), printed them, and laminated them. I studied them the weeks before our due date so I could have them on my mind and ready.

I can do this. I will do this. I am doing this!

The night before our baby’s due date, I experienced some strong contractions. My husband packed the car and prepared things for us to leave. I was still able to laugh and talk, I knew it wasn’t time to rush to the hospital. I thought “I’d really love to get a good night’s sleep first” and so we went to bed around midnight.

I was able to sleep until the contractions startled me awake around 8 am! I said a few prayers of gratitude for a good nights’ sleep and pleaded for things to go smoothly during our potential “birth day.” My husband was busy with the boys’ breakfasts and morning routine; I spent some time laboring in bed. I got up and found the app online for timing contractions and started keeping a record. I wondered—would this baby really be born on her due date? I noticed that the day was St. Lucia day and made a mental note of it.

I finished packing a few bags, ate breakfast, talked with my boys—and paused for each contraction. Now they were starting to take my breath away. I breathed through them and held on to whatever I could grab when they came. When each contraction was over, I continued with what I was doing. After a few hours, I retreated to the shower. The water was incredibly relaxing, so I started to fill the tub for a bath. My husband had to warm water on the stove because we ran out of hot water (lots of morning laundry), which I thought was humorous and reminiscent of the generations of women who needed someone to heat water for them to prepare for labor & birth.

In the bathtub, the contractions continued and increased in intensity—I smiled between them, encouraged that my body was DOING THE WORK it knew how to do and that I would meet my baby girl that day. I visualized a gift box—opening slowly, perfectly…the crisp edges fanning out to a wide-open space. I imagined a warm, bright, golden-yellow light swirling around my laboring belly—giving me strength and motivation to breathe deeply and relax. These two visualizations were very helpful as I labored at home.

While I was visualizing, breathing, and focusing—my husband made phone calls to get our boys taken care of, cleaned the house, and called our doula. He checked on me regularly, I was grateful for the work he was doing to prepare for us to leave. When the contractions became strong enough, I asked him to stay in the bathroom with me—to give me counter pressure. I have had back labor through each of my labor experiences and the counter pressure makes ALL THE DIFFERENCE when breathing through that kind of intensity.

My husband breathed with me, counted the contractions and minutes, pushed on my lower back to offer relief, and gave me small kisses. His presence and support were amazing during those hours laboring at home. We thought my water had broken and felt confident things were moving quickly, so we sent text messages to both doulas to meet us at the hospital. The bumps, curves, and quick stops were a challenge, but overall it wasn’t a bad drive…and we were there!

When the registration desk realized that I was in active labor, they shooed us down to the labor & delivery wing of the small hospital. I muttered something under my breath about how I was planning to pre-register that week while Trevor briskly pushed me down the hallway. We left everything in the car so we could quickly get in and get settled. Our previous experience included 24-hour labors so we thought we were far from finished.

One of my doulas was already in our room; it was great to see a familiar face. The nurses pulled up my information; I was checked and signed a few forms. I went to the bathroom and came back to more nurses—they needed to take some blood work. I moaned deeply through the contractions, they took blood, and Trevor gave counter pressure each time. My other doula arrived and put her hand gently on my shoulder when she greeted me…it felt like magic, I instantly relaxed. I thanked her for coming and apologized to everyone in the room for the things I might say or do over the coming hours. They laughed…but I was serious.

I told my doulas how great it was, I knew the contractions were doing hard work and I was focusing on my positive affirmations. A nurse asked about the group B strep antibiotic and on a whim, I refused it. They had me sign a paper and had nothing more to say about it, I was grateful. I didn’t want any extra thing to keep me attached with tubes. They had the monitor set up for continuous monitoring but I tried my best to ignore it and moved as freely as I could. I was back and forth from the bathroom and then on a birthing ball when they came into put in my IV line (hep-lock). It was hospital policy—I didn’t mind since I knew they would put it in and it would be ready if we needed to hook it up for any reason.

Unfortunately, it took several nurses and more than several attempts to find the right vein (both hands, multiple sticks), which was challenging to labor through. My doulas kept cool cloths on my head, my hands massaged, and soothing words in my ears. I kept my eyes closed nearly the entire time.

I can do this. I will do this. I am doing this!

After my water broke (we were wrong about it breaking earlier at home) all over Trevor’s pants (sorry, honey!), the work of labor kicked up a notch (or two, or three!) and I had no idea (I requested not to be told my centimeter-measured progress) I was in transition. The pain was fast, sharp, full and overpowering. I breathed hard and fast. I felt the need to push but my dilation was not so far that it was pushing time (this same thing happened with my last labor after my water broke—contractions PLUS resisting the urge to push). I remembered that it was the beginning of my lack of focus last time. I looked at my doula and she said, “relax and breathe.”

I trusted them. I trusted my doulas, my husband, and my doctor. I knew they wanted me to have a positive birthing experience. I felt the warmth of the contractions and I couldn’t even think of the gift box opening anymore. I could barely imagine the swirls of light around my birthing body…it was crowding in.  I told them I wanted in the water. I needed in the water. The nurses scrambled and then reported back that they were missing some wire or connector for the fetal monitor to go in the water.

I asked if I could still get into the tub, and they said ‘no.’ I said “seriously?!” The pain was taking over…and I said it: “Can I have an epidural, then?” They all looked shocked and dismissed my request (Trevor was behind me motioning the DO NOT DO IT sign). I asked again, this time with a more demanding voice. My doulas swooped in with words of encouragement and gentle reminders. I couldn’t really think about it, all I wanted was some relief. I had lost my focus, the water wasn’t an option, and I wanted to be soothed. Another contraction came and left with intensity—I breathed hard and loud—and then one of my doulas said: “she wants a water birth…can she have a water birth?”

I remember it as a swirl of commotion—‘what? She wants a water birth?…we have to check her chart to see if she took the blood test…oh yes she did, she can do it…let’s fill the tub…’ We had left our typed up birth plan (and a basket of chocolates for the nurses) in the car…along with my labor outfit, our camera, video camera, labor food, etc. They didn’t know, and I couldn’t even THINK to tell them. Thankfully, our doula was focused and quick. Before I knew it, I had several people helping me gracelessly get situated in a wheelchair to be carried to the water birth room.

I kept my eyes closed most of the time, but I can visualize the few times I opened them during labor. I remember opening them randomly during the drive and initial hospital set-up, during the blood draws, the change in labor positions, the trips to the bathroom, the first IV poke, and as I stepped into the water birthing tub.

The lights were low, there were battery powered tea lights all along the rim of the tub, and there were soft glowing color lights under the water. The water was warm (a balmy 97 degrees) and as my body relaxed under the comforting blanket of the water, I looked around the room and said with the energy of triumph: “I’m having a water birth!”

I can do this. I will do this. I am doing this!

I have been told that when I stepped into the water-birthing tub, my entire countenance changed. I felt it. The pain was still there, the pressure was still intense, the contractions kept coming, and the hard work of labor & delivery was still present—but there is something about the water—it changes the nature of the experience.

The birthing tub offered a sense of security—I felt covered, clothed in water and a kind of privacy, even though I was wearing nothing. I think there is something divine about water—the way I feel around oceans and waterfalls—a feeling that seems to pass through my skin all the way to my soul. I was able to move around in the water—opening up my pelvis in ways I could not do if I was on “dry ground”. It was very liberating. I found myself coming back to the same place though—on my hands and knees—my forehead near the front of the tub.

The nurses worked hard to keep a good read on my baby’s heartbeat (not easy since they still were missing some connecting wires)—they took turns leaning over the tub to keep the monitor in place and finally resorted to just checking in between contractions. Dr. H came in and greeted everyone, he checked me and showed with his hands how far along I had progressed. I had no idea how close we were, so when he said: “Ok, you can push now!” I couldn’t believe it. I said “really!?” and then something like “I don’t know what to do now!”

I knew the work of labor from my previous births but I had never pushed and had no idea what to do to get this baby out! I tried to remember what I had read and discussed with my doulas previously…mind-body connection…and that I didn’t have much more work left before my baby would be in my arms. I still needed counter pressure on my lower back, so Trevor and our doulas took turns behind me with pressure and in front of me with support on my shoulders and cool cloths on my neck/forehead. I started pushing and felt grateful for the security and comfort that the birthing tub gave me.

After a few pushes, I realized that wimpy pushes would just mean I would be pushing and contracting longer—so I decided at the next contraction, I would push with all of the energy I had left. I pushed and groaned a loud, deep-throated primal sound. I did the same thing again and this time I felt a burning pressure—my doula told me this was great and that I would continue to feel that as I birthed my baby. Within a minute or two (it’s all kind of a blur), and after another forceful push, I sat up and opened my eyes.

I looked down and saw a figure floating in the water below me—what I didn’t immediately realize was that my baby was born and my doctor (who really had just stood back and let me do my work) was gently guiding her in the water up towards me. I placed my hands around her little body and pulled her out of the water up to my chest. Our eyes locked for the first time and I couldn’t believe it. Trevor hugged my shoulders and between tears told me what an awesome job I did. All I could think was –“ really?! Did I just DO that?!”

The moments after her birth felt so surreal. I was able to sit in the warm water, cradling my newborn baby for as long as I wanted. I stared in awe at the completion of my first natural birth & my first baby girl. I told her that I loved her and kissed the top of her head. I do not remember every specific detail of those early postpartum minutes—but I will always remember the feelings of joy, triumph, and gratitude.

Trevor cut the cord while my baby girl and I enjoyed skin-to-skin cuddling. I nursed as soon as she wanted to latch on, and all of the extras were delayed until we were ready. We found out a couple of hours after delivery that she weighed in at 10 lbs 3 oz! I sustained one small internal/external tear that required no stitches and we were able to return home after a little over 24 hours of her birth.

My labor lasted around nine hours and I was only in the hospital for about three hours before she was born. Her birth was everything I had always hoped and wished for my babies and myself. This birth experience has given me a renewed sense of self, a healing balm, and a feeling of empowerment. I have felt very close to divinity as I have pondered the emotions, people, and events leading up to my VBA2C.

We named our baby girl Noelle Lucia and she is my dream come true.

Filed Under: Birth Story, VBAC Tags: Birth Story, VBAC, VBAMC

Birth Story: Anne’s VBA2C

January 18, 2018 by blog 1 Comment

Originally published in 2012; link to Amazon Smile that donates a portion of proceeds to ICAN


2nd heartbeatFor those who don’t know where it all began, I’ll start with my first pregnancy. August 2008 – I got pregnant with my DD and worked with the Midwife Center to attempt a natural delivery. The entire pregnancy was full of complications, which I won’t go into,  but it came down to me going 41 weeks when they eventually diagnosed me as having preeclampsia and offered a c-section or induced labor. No labor signs had come up to that point so I elected the routine section given my daughter didn’t seem ready to come out anyway. Recovery was very hard, but I got by.

Three months postpartum, I discovered that I was pregnant again and, needless to say, shocked, but learned about VBACs and found a practice that supported my desire to attempt one. This pregnancy went fine except for the fact that it was full of stress having to move, take care of my DD, and mentally and physically prepare to have another child within a year. I tried everything to go into labor naturally using the advice of a wonderful doula I was working with but wound up going 42 weeks and a day without any signs of labor. After getting an ultrasound, they found that my amniotic fluids were dropping and urged that I get my son out asap. With much remorse, I consented to have a repeat section given I really had no choice; obviously, I wanted my son to come out alive. While they were performing the operation, they discovered that the lining of my uterus was so thin they could see my son through it (aka dehiscence) and said it was good that I didn’t labor since I would have ruptured. The recovery was very rough and throughout the following year, I had numerous health issues which I attribute to having two surgeries so close together.

Fast forward to August 2011. I got pregnant again. Returned to my former OB/GYN practice only to be told that they were not very supportive of me attempting a VBA2C. I went looking at other practices only to be told repeatedly that they would not allow me to VBA2C since it was too dangerous and I could rupture. Desperate, I contacted the Doulas of Pittsburgh in January seeking advice about alternative options for bringing this baby into the world. Was home birth something I could consider? Maybe. So I asked about working with a lay midwife who could give me tips for having a natural delivery. I got the name of a woman and we spoke at length about my past pregnancies to which she said she thought she could help me. The Doulas also gave me the name of a doctor at Magee who was very pro VBAC and recommended I speak with him to seek his counsel.

I made an appointment with Dr. K and, after having looked at my post-op records, said that he felt I could attempt a VBA2C but only because I was double sutured (they sewed my uterine wall twice to make it extra secure). He said I had a 7 out of 10 chance of having a natural delivery but that the damage that could result if I did rupture would be bad. I decided it was worth the risk and, upon his suggestion, worked with the Midwives at Magee for my prenatal care while simultaneously using the lay midwife for the bulk of my prenatal needs. The lay midwife came to my house and spent many hours talking to me about things that were issues from my past as well as problems in the present. She said I had a lot to work through mentally if I was going to have a natural delivery as that, along with hormonal imbalances, was preventing labor. I also went to seek medical help from a chiropractor who worked on correcting my imbalances which helped me tremendously.

After months of emotional healing, reading an awesome book, and getting alternative health treatments, I really started to believe it could be possible to VBA2C, that is until I had a follow up with Dr. K at my 39-week checkup. He told me that the midwives were divided about my being able to labor and were not all supportive of me going forward with it due to my dehiscence. They didn’t know what would happen under my circumstances since so few women have ever attempted a VBA2C knowing they also had a window in their uterine wall. I was their guinea pig, so to speak, and they were going to watch me very closely as this was a birth that they would be talking about a lot in the future, whichever way it goes.  I couldn’t believe he was telling me this after working with them for months. I felt like they pulled the rug right out from under me. I was so sick of people telling me I was high risk!  Bottom line, he wanted me to know that if something should go wrong that they weren’t to blame.  It was such a blow to my confidence that I felt like I was all alone and fell back into worry. I called my lay midwife and explained all this, only to get an amazing pep talk that filled me once again with the peace of mind knowing that whatever happens will be ok but that there is more chance of success than failure, especially if I believed it.

A few more weeks came and went until it was my due date, May 20th. However there were no signs of labor and again, I started to worry. Was all this preparation for a VBA2C in vain? Would my body fail me again? Would people tell me I told you so? Would I survive a natural delivery? The thoughts that went through my head were hard. It was the toughest time in my pregnancy. Days went by and still nothing but the usual stretching until on May 27th, I got my first contraction! It was the most wonderful feeling in the world and I couldn’t believe my body was actually doing what it was supposed to. Something I was doing was working!

My contractions were steady at 40 seconds long every 8 minutes. Sunday night, the contractions stopped only to start again the next morning at about the same rate. That night they tapered back again but still stayed with me. That morning, the 29th, I had an appointment with the Midwives at Magee for a BPP ultrasound and followup. The ultrasound looked great so the baby was in good shape. The midwife, M, saw me and said that I was 3 centimeters dilated and asked if I wanted her to sweep my membranes to get things moving. She did and shortly after, I started getting stronger contractions though still at about the same rate. My husband and I walked around the hospital, ate a good sized lunch, and then felt like it was time to admit myself to triage since the pain was strong enough for me to not want to leave. My lay midwife was called in (under the title of my doula) and she, my husband, and I waited in the labor room for things to progress. My body was feeling the pain but it was nothing overwhelming. And then about 3 hours of the same pattern of contractions, the nurse-midwife offered to break my sack of water, which I agreed to. Immediately my body went into full transition labor and stayed there for about an hour. It was so painful that I felt like dying, but my lay midwife kept telling me to not give into the fear, to ride the wave, and to stay on top of the pain. It could not conquer me, especially after all I had done to get to this point. It was really a battle between my mind and my body, and I had to not let my mind be controlled by that pain but had to just let the two work together.

Once I felt the urge to push, things really went quickly and within 2 minutes, I went from 7 to 10 centimeters and felt my baby coming. Five minutes after that, her head had descended but she was in distress, so they rushed a team of doctors in to prepare to take me to a section and started giving me oxygen. However, the midwife told me to push hard to get her out since she was so close to coming out. I pushed with everything I had in me and soon enough, my baby was born! Her Apgar was very low so they had to resuscitate her and I started hemorrhaging from a severe vaginal and 4 centimeter long cervical tear. They had to rush me to the OR to start stitching me up but thankfully, it was nothing that would have any permanent damage. They had never seen a tear that bad before and couldn’t figure out why it happened but in the end, I was still happy because I had her naturally. Not the ideal labor but whoever gets that anyway, right?

So that’s my story and I pray it gives some hope to those of you who are struggling to believe a VBAC is possible for you. So many people doubted this could happen and yet, with the right physical and emotional support, along with keeping a positive outlook and praying for God’s help, I got what I wanted. It’s so cool to think that I have blazed the trail for other mothers who want to VBA2C as well as provide new hope for those who have had dehiscence. All things are possible if you believe! I wish all of you the best in your journey towards VBACing.

Filed Under: Birth Story, CBAC, VBAC Tags: Birth Story, VBAC, VBAMC

Birth Story: Maria’s VBA2C

January 16, 2018 by blog Leave a Comment

Originally published in 2012


AEMLike all VBAC stories, mine starts with the birth of my first child. My oldest was breech from 19 weeks on to the end – the girl would not budge. We were in the midst of trying everything under the sun to flip her around and look for an OB who would do a breech delivery but at 37 weeks, my water broke and the game was over. Contractions started pretty much right away but knowing that she was breech, it didn’t make sense for me to sit around laboring at that point so we went right in for the c-section. Aside from throwing up on my daughter the first time I held her, it went pretty well; my recovery was smooth and relatively easy.  At the first mention of her being breech, and the possibility of a c-section, I was already researching VBAC. Knowing that I could do a VBAC with my next really helped me accept my first c-section.

Just 9 short months later we found out we were expecting number 2. I went wild with VBAC research and was excited to take on the challenge. The option of a repeat cesarean never even crossed my mind. It was NOT an option for me. This way of thinking turned out to be a big mistake.

At a routine check-up at 33 weeks, my blood pressure was elevated and I had protein in my urine. It was bad – they sent me straight to L&D for 24-hour monitoring. By the time I got over to L&D though, the doctors were saying I would be staying there, on bed rest, until it was time to have the baby. That ended up not mattering because less then 24 hours later, my nurse came in to tell me not to eat my breakfast and not to eat or drink anything else. It’s amazing how “don’t eat your breakfast” can rip your heart out when you know what it means. Again the c-section went well – my son did as well as you would expect for a 33 weeker. While my c-section recovery was phenomenally easy, the preeclampsia recovery was slow and scary. I was stuck in my hospital bed for a week with only one or two NICU visits a day. It gave me a lot of time to think about all the “would’ve, could’ve, should’ve” and by the time I left the hospital, I had a small list of goals for my next pregnancy.

1) Stay healthy. Avoid getting pre-eclampsia again.
2) Make it to at least 38 weeks.
3) Labor. Even if I knew things would end in a cesarean for whatever reason, I still wanted to labor for as long as I could.
4) VBA2C

It’s amazing how many nights I laid in bed unable to sleep just dwelling on these goals. They consumed me long before we were even planning a third child. I knew that there were parts I didn’t really have any control over. I knew some obscure problem or abnormality could show up and I would be unable to prevent it but I also knew that there were things I could control. Staying healthy was the most difficult for me – I’ve always had really grand ideas of how I want to eat but the fact of the matter is I love junk. I love sugar (really, who doesn’t?).  I decided to try the Brewers diet to avoid pre-eclampsia. I know there are plenty of people out there who don’t believe in it but after looking it over, I couldn’t see how it could hurt to try. My goal for health didn’t stop there though. I wasn’t going to let any other conditions rain on my parade either and because of my love of sugar, I was particularly worried about gestational diabetes. To combat this, I cut all refined sugars out of my diet. This is not an easy task for a sugar-craving pregnant momma, let me tell you! Making it to 38 weeks was the one goal I felt like I had the least amount of control over. My water had broken at 37 weeks with my daughter and it seemed like early babies might just be ‘my thing.’ I didn’t want another early baby though, I wanted NORMAL and normal is late. Aside from staying healthy, all I could think of to do to accomplish this goal was pray and so pray I did.

On December 3rd, 2011, I had accomplished my first two goals and I felt amazing! I also felt ready to have a baby so prayed again “thank you, Lord, for getting me here! I’ll take my baby now.” Actually, my main prayer from pre-conception through my pregnancy was for “normal” so I should not have been surprised that I didn’t go immediately into labor after that. Nope, I prayed for normal and normal is exactly what I got. December 17th (my due date) came with no signs of labor. I truly had NOT expected to make it this far. In fact, I often joked that going late would end up being my unforeseen path to another c-section.

Finally…Wednesday, December 21st, I had an appointment to see my midwife at 4 days past my due date and with my blood pressure starting to go up, I couldn’t avoid the induction talk. Reluctantly we scheduled one for Tuesday the 27th but I was going to do everything I could to avoid it……induction was NOT a part of my VBA2C birth plan. In a last ditch effort to ‘help things along,’ I let my midwife strip my membranes. I honestly wasn’t holding my breath that it would work but by the time we were on our way home, I could already see a difference in my contractions and quickly realized that I WAS going to have this baby on my own BEFORE the induction date (praise God!). The contractions continued to progress through the evening and into the night. I was SURE the baby was going to share a birthday with my best friend on the 22nd. Around 11 pm, we packed up, brought the kids to my brother’s house and headed to the hospital. Things kept up at about the same pace all night and into the morning. Not getting stronger but not letting up, something needed to give. I either needed a break from the contractions so I could get some sleep or I needed to see some progress. As Thursday morning dawned, the contractions finally began to lighten up and space out. BUMMER! I was not happy to make the ‘walk of shame’ out of the hospital with no baby but I knew I needed the break and I also knew it wouldn’t be too long before we were back again. I had put a call into my mom that night so she was planning on coming up in the morning anyway and it was great she came because, after a completely sleepless night, I was able to rest/sleep on the couch ALL DAY.  I remember ‘coming to’ a couple times throughout the day to eat but mostly I was passed out resting up for another long night…..

Thursday, December 22 (40+5), in the evening, as we got the kids ready for bed, the contractions picked up again. They progressed quickly and within a few hours were very regular at 3-4 minutes apart. I actually hadn’t been timing the contractions myself but my mom had been listening to me breath from the other room, and like any good worried mother, came out to say “they’re really close. Are you sure you can make it to the hospital in time?!” (We had an hour drive to the hospital). I felt like we had plenty of time but this was my first time in labor and she had done it 6 times…Way to freak me out mom! We made it to the hospital around 1:00 am on Friday the 23rd (40+6). Being a VBA2C, I had to be on continuous monitoring and have a hep-lock placed. I had thought about refusing one or both but decided to just let them be. In the end, neither bothered me at all and I think it helped that the nurses had a little extra peace of mind. When first checked, I was at about 5cm and fully effaced. I was THRILLED seeing as I was a tight 2cm and only 50% effaced just 24-hours earlier. Everything was looking good and I was ready to start laboring in the tub. Unfortunately for me, we had to wait for my midwife to come check me out AND they wanted to see a little more progress before letting me jump in. And so I pressed on, finding no relief at all in the many techniques I had so look forward to trying. Somehow the nice squishy birth ball felt like I was sitting on a pole as did the birth stool. All I could do was stand and either hunch over or squat down with each contraction.

Finally my midwife arrives…I have no clue what time – it felt like forever but looking back it could not have been that long. She checks me and because the baby is still pretty high, she can’t get a good feel for how far along I am. The only way for her to tell is to try and check during a contraction. I really did try to let her but as that contraction came on, and I was laying on my back being checked, I was suddenly not so cooperative. She still couldn’t tell for sure but we were pretty sure I was complete…. Ok, I was sure I was complete, I don’t know what she thought. She also wasn’t sure at this point if my water had broken or not which was part of why she was having a hard time checking dilation.  After what felt like hours (probably more like 30-40 min) of contemplating how far along I was, I was finally let into the tub. It. Was. Heavenly. My first contraction in the tub and I felt myself pushing a little – and I couldn’t stop it. I felt like I always hear of people feeling like this hours before ‘real’ pushing begins, so I just let my body do it’s thing and I didn’t say anything. The second and third contraction in the tub and more unstoppable pushing. Fourth contraction in the tub, more pushing and then I feel something coming out….

John yells to the nurse so I know now it’s not just in my head. My midwife was just walking in – apparently, my bag of waters was bulging out, so she grabs it and pops it. In hindsight this bothers me to no end. I’m trying really hard to not let it get to me because in the big picture it’s such a small detail but she didn’t even ask….I had seriously dreamt of having a baby born in the caul and if she hadn’t done that I may have…. *sigh* move on. Anyway, just like that I can feel baby slide back UP. Not a good feeling. Turns out, my midwife had just come in to get me out of the tub. Baby’s heart rest was not doing well at all and they needed to get a better monitor on him. They whisked me, ‘kicking and screaming’, out of the tub and back to the bed. Since I began planning an unmedicated birth 5 years and three kids ago, I had planned for many different options (water, birth stool, squatting bar…) but not ONCE did I imagine I would be in bed, pushing from my back. This was all wrong and I just knew I couldn’t do it this way. My *picture perfect* birth was gone and I suddenly felt like everyone was doing whatever they wanted to me and I didn’t like it. I felt myself becoming very uncooperative and even more pessimistic about seeing this birth through (which I guess is normal in this stage of labor regardless of the situation). A couple minutes later, baby had an internal monitor screwed into his head and I was told to push. I couldn’t though. Pushing felt all wrong in bed. The position just seemed like it was totally conflicting with what my body was trying to do. In this moment of feeling completely out of control, I remembered my birth plan. Once again I took to prayer. I reminded myself that I alone did not have the strength to do this but I did have a God who could give me the strength. About two or three contractions later when my mind started to clear a little, I started to see the concern on the nurses face and I started actually listening to my midwife and as I began to listen, I could hear my midwife telling me we needed to get baby out ASAP, he wasn’t doing well, and we needed to hurry. I heard as a nurse left the room to call in my back up OB in case they needed to use the vacuum. I had heard enough, and got my focus.

I had already lost the water birth – there was NO WAY they were going to use that vacuum. The baby needed to come out and I was the only one who could make that happen. Once I was able to set my mind to it, it was only about 5 more contractions before he was out. Ahh, the indescribable feeling of a baby slip sliding its way out. That moment when the weight of the world has been lifted from your shoulders. That moment you realize you actually did it! That moment when simply holding your baby is more important then finding out if you have a son or daughter. That moment! Wow, it’s been almost 8 months now and thinking back to that moment is intense. Looking back at that moment, seeing how much emotion was jam-packed into it, THAT moment is what was missing from my c-section babies. Sure the first time I held them it was special and amazing but that moment was not there. I got to hold him for a second but he wasn’t crying, and because his heart rate had been so low, he was quickly taken from me again. As they took him from my arms I quickly looked to see if the baby was a girl or boy…..It’s a BOY! (I knew it!) I watched as they looked him over, still not crying, but also no concern on the doctors face. A few more minutes passed and still no crying. Finally, they handed my quiet little baby back to me, perfectly pink and healthy, just quiet.

Born at 4:54 am, on December 23rd.
(40 weeks 6 days)
Weighing in at 8lbs 14oz (seriously can’t I just say 9lbs?)
It wasn’t exactly what I had dreamed but it was perfect and beautiful.
I had done the impossible!

Filed Under: Birth Story, Cesarean, VBAC Tags: Birth Story, VBAC, VBAMC

Birth Story: Cassandra’s VBA2C

January 11, 2018 by blog

By Cassandra Forcier (originally shared in the ICAN of Chicago Facebook group); originally posted in 2015

WE DID IT!!!
On November 12th my daughter was born vaginally with no epidural.
Juniper Celeste
9lb 8 oz, 20 3/4 inches
It was the biggest single accomplishment I could have made. I didn’t do it alone. I really couldn’t have. I needed support. I had my husband and my doula by my side for the craziest 12 hours. 6 days later and I have never felt so good. I have never been so happy. I want to help anyone I can to reach their goals too. If anyone needs help, please message me.

Cassandra Forcier vbacphoto used with Cassandra’s permission

Guessing at approximate times, things are a blur!

8:20 AM: OB broke my water, I was at 4 centimeters. OB was giving us 6 hours to show at least some progression. We had a total of 24 hours.

9:30 AM: Shawna Mertens, our doula, arrives and helps get me into all kinds of movements and exercises to get labor going. I felt fairly clueless about how to make it go really fast. We were on a clock after all. We all spent the next hours talking, laughing (during contractions was not very fun for me, but my hubby can’t help but crack jokes). It really helped to pass time and keep positive.

1:00 PM: 5 centimeters is enough to have the OB let me continue to labor. More dancing around and squatting and talking. Doula transforms bed into a rocket ship (just kidding, but hospital beds can do so much if you know what you are doing) so that I can get some rest while still in a great position to bring baby down.

6:00 PM: 8 centimeters, OB says we “bought more time,” husband and doula are not too happy with bedside manner. I had no real recollection of that, I got to hear about that after.

6:45 PM: 8.5 centimeters, OB reminds me that if I get an epidural, they won’t have to put me under if there is an emergency. I found the next hour to be unbearable. I couldn’t focus or tell anyone how that scared me. I am terrified of general anesthesia.

7:45 PM: OB is called because I am so ready to push I can’t think about anything else. It took my amazing husband yelling for me to not push before this. It was so uncontrollable.

7:50 PM: OB is trying to give me instructions on how to push, I could not care any less.

8:02 PM: My daughter is in my arms.

BACKSTORY:

I had two very traumatic cesareans with my first two babies. They are 8 and 5 now. My husband and I tried for what felt like the longest two and a half years of our life to have another baby. This time we were sure that no matter what, we would do anything we could to not repeat a cesarean. It’s funny because when we first talked about it, it didn’t cross my mind too much that a cesarean could even happen. I wanted to have a VBAC and nothing could stop me. My cesareans had gone “well,” no crazy complications, and my other two pregnancies were perfectly normal. The only reason I had my first cesarean was because of doctors’ and nurses’ agendas and my lack of knowledge at the time. This time would be different though. My husband and I were armed to the teeth with info, statistics, and a fierce need to succeed.

“HIGHLIGHTS” OF MY PREGNANCY OB APPOINTMENTS:

It wasn’t until about our 20-week appointment that our OB would really talk to us about VBA2C. We originally asked him if he would be okay with a VBA2C. Immediately he said no, too dangerous. We left that appointment pretty upset and concerned. My next appointment, I decided to tell him that I wanted a VBAC, so what do I need to do to prepare now to make sure that happens. I told him about the statistics and risks and why it was so important to us. I asked him if there were any extra risks because of my previous c-sections and asked if we could pull charts to prove that they went well. I reminded him that each cesarean poses even more health risks.

Suddenly it seemed like less of a big deal to him. He said he would check with his group at Illinois Masonic. At our next appointment, he gave us decent news. There are 9 OBs total, 3 opposed, 3 said yes, and 3 said if we come in near transition. We felt okay with this.

Later, we started getting rules about our VBAC. He wanted an epidural in place in case I need a cesarean, we needed constant fetal monitoring (good thing they have wireless), if our baby got “too big” we would need to have her sooner via cesarean, etc. Everything was okay until 38 weeks though. That’s when things got really scary for us.

I got excited first, after a week of pre-labor I was 1 centimeter dilated—glad something happened. Our OB told us that if we wanted to “pull the plug at any point and just schedule that cesarean,” we could. I pretty much lost it. I was in shock. I realized that he was against us and this was not going to happen. I got so scared. We told him absolutely not, we weren’t doing it. He said, “well, we will try stripping the membranes next week, and see what happens.”

That is when I got in touch with a doula. I realized that we needed extra help if we were going to get this to happen. Damn, did that make all the difference, for so many reasons. 39 weeks, the OB says he will give us until 40 weeks because our baby was already at least 8 pounds at the last ultrasound. He stripped the membranes and I was 3-4 centimeters. Nothing happened. I started to really lose it.

Supportive hubby and doula helped me to keep my head on straight. 38 weeks on, we were walking miles, eating spicy foods, pineapple, sex, literally everything you could try to start labor. EVERYTHING. Our 40-week appointment came around and I felt like I was headed to the chopping block. After a good talk with our OB, telling him again why having a VBAC was so important to us, he gave us a choice. To have the cesarean or have my water broken in the morning the next day. Obviously we opted to have my water broken.

TIPS THAT MIGHT HELP YOU:

1. Make sure your OB/midwife knows that you know what you are talking about. Don’t let them brush things off, they may not be totally opposed, it might be more about them trying to take the “easy” way out.

2. Know your stuff. This might seem redundant, but it’s really important to keep you confident that what you are saying is the best outcome for you. Your OB might not even know all the facts.

3. Get a doula or at the very least, an extra birth partner. I really think our doula saved us in the end for multiple reasons. My husband needed her so that he could do his best for me. She also knew some crazy tricks that helped us get labor to really get going.

4. Try to stay positive. Even when it is hard, you need to get yourself in the right state of mind to get things working. I really had my ups and downs, but when we went to the delivery room, I left my fears at the door. If you can’t forget, make distractions. Laugh, joke, play games. Whatever to pass the time.

5. Seriously consider no epidural. I think that I needed all of the experience to make it work well. Transition was hard, but it is short and pushing may have been the best part to me. Can’t even explain that one. It only took 7 minutes because I could feel what I was doing. I think it makes a real difference.

This birth story was originally shared in the ICAN of Chicago Facebook group with the following note from Cassandra: “Hi everyone! I just want to start off by thanking each and every one of you in this group. I know I haven’t spoken to everyone, but this group stands for so very much. I have posted a couple of times during my pregnancy, and each time, I got some sort of great response. It helped me keep my chin up and keep trying to stay hopeful. Sorry this post will be really long! Skip to the end if you just want highlights and things I’ve gathered from my whole experience, I just needed to write!”

Filed Under: Birth Story Tags: Birth Story, VBAC, VBAMC

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